We’re Asking: How Are You? Really.
This Sunday is International Women’s Day. And before the noise of it all - the posts and and the celebrating - we want to ask you something.
How are you? Not the “I’m fine” version. The real one.
Because we’re not here to celebrate how much women can juggle, or tell you that you can have it all. We’re here to say - put some of it down for five minutes. And maybe, just maybe, let someone actually check in on you.
The Invisible Load Is Very Real
Let’s talk about the thing nobody puts on a motivational poster. The school runs. The appointments. The mental checklist that never fully empties. The ageing parent who needs more than you have to give. The career you’re holding together with one hand. The home. The kids. The friend who’s in crisis. The grief you keep postponing because there simply isn’t time.
This is the invisible load. And it is heavy. Nobody hands out awards for it. Nobody sees the version of you that lies awake at 2am running through tomorrow’s list. But it’s real, it’s relentless, and it takes a toll.
And somewhere in the middle of all of it - quietly, gradually - you disappeared a little.
The Strain Nobody Warned You About
The anxiety that arrives from nowhere. The sleeplessness. The rage. The sadness with no name. The feeling that you’re losing your mind - when actually, you’re just not being given the full picture about your own biology.
Millions of women are quietly falling apart and wondering why they can’t cope. Spoiler: it’s not because you’re weak. It’s because you’re carrying something real, often with very little support, and a body that is going through enormous change at the same time.
Women are twice as likely as men to be diagnosed with anxiety or depression. Suicide attempts in women have risen by over 25% in the last decade. Behind every one of those statistics is a woman who didn’t think she was struggling enough to ask for help. If that’s you - you are. You are enough to ask.
The Guilt
Here’s the thing we keep seeing. Women who give the most generous, compassionate, spot-on advice to everyone around them - and take absolutely none of it for themselves.
“Rest.” “Ask for help.” “You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
You’ve said it to her. And her. And her. So why does taking an hour to yourself still feel like something you have to earn? Why does a bath, a walk, saying no (or yes) to something come wrapped in guilt?
The guilt isn’t truth. It’s just what happens when you’ve been last on your own list for too long. Rest is not a reward for getting everything done. It’s part of being human.
Check On Your Friends. Especially the Ones Who Seem Fine.
There’s a particular kind of woman who always shows up for everyone else. Who holds space like it’s effortless. Who answers every call, turns up with wine and good advice, and never once asks for anything back. She seems fine. She’s probably not fine.
Send the text. Ask the real question - not “how are you” but “how are you actually.” Sit in the answer, even if it’s uncomfortable. Be to her what she is to everyone else.
And if you are her - let someone in. You deserve to be held too.
Now Do Something Just For You
This Women’s Day, we’re not asking you to do more. We’re asking you to do less - for everyone else - and something just for you.
Dance. Rest. Say yes to yourself for once. Put the sparkles on. Take up space. Book the thing you’ve been putting off. Let someone look after you.
You are not just what you carry. You are not just what you hold together for everyone else. You are a whole, brilliant, complex person who deserves the same care you give so freely to others.
Go sparkle. Like the goddamn disco ball you are. ✨
Happy International Women’s Day. 💜
